7 years ago, I started this blog. And since 6 years ago, it has been hosted on this domain. This blog has been crucial in parts of my life, including these past few years.
Trying to discover some information I wanted to share on this blog, I met my wife, to who I’ve been happily married for over a year. An important reason why I stayed in Poland, eventually avoiding being in Ukraine when Russia started its invasion.
That last part is also why I have decided to give up on this blog. My reliance in life is the acceptance of differences in everything, especially opinions. I am not quick to press the block button on social media and am usually open to discussing even things I’m afraid I have to disagree with. However, that’s precisely what has been taken away many times while writing this blog. It’s like we already had to remove several posts and translations due to WordAds’s family-safe rules, which show very clearly how those operating the system are disconnected from the outside world. But that has in part to do with algorithms.
Which is the point I have been writing about, as we’ve been shadowbanned once more over the fact that my eldest son shared a translation of a Ukrainian song. (As confirmed by one of the advertisers we’re directly in contact with for years already.) What is wrong with this post, I wouldn’t even know. But it’s not like this hasn’t happened in the past several times before, as we’ve literally had problems over one translation of a PSA in support of orphans. It was confirmed this was a wrongfully marked ‘violation’, but it didn’t change the fact that no advertising was running during the time of review, costing us a lot of revenue that we use to pay for the content we share on this blog, as Google at that time didn’t credit us for the missed time.
The problems we have experienced with WordAds are the reason why since recently there has been advertising by [REMOVED BY WEBMASTER] also showing up on our blog. WordAds suspended us in August over claims of breaking their ToS, which turned out not to be the case, while they did in fact break the agreements they made with us. It’s when we decided to give [REMOVED BY WEBMASTER] a try. And we will admit, we have only positive experiences with them. The downside with them is simply the fact that their revenue is a lot lower, which causes us to pay for fewer licenses, by this less content shared and again less revenue. It has been a circle that has been continuing spiraling, causing me to invest more and more of my family’s money into keeping this blog alive. Hence since these past few days, we’ve temporarily removed UDM’s code to see if WordAds might remove the shadowban. If not, we will obviously fully move over to [REMOVED BY WEBMASTER] instead until we will possibly close this blog completely in the future, probably very soon.
As I have shared in the past, I don’t believe in accepting donations. I am personally strongly against initiatives like Patreon, as at the end of the day people earn a lot more through this than they factually need to keep doing what they do. It’s the choice of people to pay for this, I am not against this. I’m rather against earning through something that leaves enough time to do a proper job. This is different for content creators that do factually spend all their days making content. But for a lot of people, myself included, there’s more than enough time besides blogging and vlogging to work a full-time job. It’s no secret that I have a full-time job myself beyond this blog. The whole reason for advertisement on this blog is to keep it self-sustaining, as it was more a hobby than anything else. A relief for my feelings in both good and bad times, although admittingly mostly bad times. My translations come out of depression, as a notable example.
And I think it is best for me to be completely honest. We’ve long relied on the trust we have in Ukrainian companies, especially Imena/Mirohost and Besthosting.ua. Before the war, it was affordable, and generally speaking, they delivered far better services than the other companies we tried. As we did try other options at times, like the Lithuanian Hostinger, which started out cheap but then forced us into an extremely expensive hosting option due to us “exceeding their hosting limits”. A limit that was so low that literally all other companies we’ve been in contact with confirmed that this low limit should be unacceptable. And that while Hostinger is praised around the web for their “oh-so-great service”. I sincerely wonder how much they pay the people who share this nonsense… Imena/Mirohost has always treated us with the utmost respect and the best support possible to offer, even when there were problems going on, like the several DDoS attacks we’ve experienced since the start of this year. But what else should be expected of a hosting company that hosts some of Ukraine’s most important websites?
I don’t come from an upbringing with lots of money around me. The exact opposite. It has caused me to see the importance of not only charity, which I have dedicated my life toward, but far more about achieving what you want yourself. When I was very young, I dedicated so much time to learning, especially languages. Something that still surprises people is that, unlike shams, I can have a conversation and switch around languages without much trouble. However, what shouldn’t surprise is that many have wanted to make use of it. But the thing is, as I have grown older, I did realize something important. It’s something that I got taught by people all over the world through the oh-so-beloved social media. It’s no secret that I have a disliking of social media. But the 1 good thing is that it has shown how people can drop you without a second thought. I might seem like a goody-two-shoes to some people, but I am not stupid. Just because I still speak to certain people, doesn’t mean I actually like you. I know how you treat me, even when I don’t say it to your face.
It’s this that has made me adopt 5 children and take care of and become the guardian of several unaccompanied Ukrainian children, together with my most wonderful wife. As I don’t want to be like people that say 1 thing and do another. I want to be that person that fully dedicates himself to what he believes in and doesn’t have two faces ever. In my case, it is bringing joy, happiness, safety, and a good upbringing to those disadvantaged children that have lost their biological parents. It’s not my goal to replace their biological parents, unlike what a lot of other adoptive parents do, but to help them through their childhood and puberty, and to the adulthood they deserve.
I do this with the help of outside voices, like those adoptees who have become broken by the fact of being adopted. As adoption is quite often not a good thing. As it shouldn’t be forgotten that after the over 20 failed adoptions I have been through as an adoptee, I got emancipated not long after I was adopted by my parents, not without reasons. It might be very controversial to say this these days, but it happened in Russia, where the following applies, for the sake of clarity:
I have made it clear to all of my children that the choices in their life all theirs. I take responsibility for their mistakes and the other bad that might happen, and all the good is theirs. One such choice is my full openness to give them the option to explore their biological background, with my full support. It’s how we just a short while ago became aware that Aleks and Kasia have a younger biological sibling, which we’ve been able to lay contact with through the amazing support of their sibling’s mother who confirmed some of the adoption details were not shared with her either. Anyone who has been through adoption as either an adoptee or parent should know how much work it takes to get to information such as that.
It’s also why I only wish to adopt older children. Yes, it’s often said that it’s easier to make a bond with younger children, but I believe strongly that adoption should be the choice of a child, not just of the parents and their current children. Besides, younger children are very likely to be adopted in general, while older children often are forgotten and eventually become adults without ever getting adopted, left to the lacking care society gives to these adolescents and young adults by that time.
And there’s so much more to be said, but I would digress too much. What I would say to anyone who thinks that a bond is extremely hard to make with older children in care, is that I have good bonds with all of my children because it is possible if you show affection, love, understanding, and the willingness to do everything in name of them, not yourself. Does that mean there aren’t ever struggles? Of course not. It’s like I shared in my recent blog post that Aleks doesn’t speak Russian, only to learn afterward from our eldest son that Aleks never shared with me that he does speak a bit of Russian. And I waited patiently until Aleks eventually shared it with me, which he did.
Adoption can be both good and bad. It’s very individual. And maybe I’m just lucky to give my children what is good for them. But like I said, I believe in adoption being about the child, not me personally. And that’s the reason why my parents let me get emancipated as well. Because after I got adopted, I was so scarred that I didn’t need parents or siblings, I needed the independence to decide my own life with some helpful advice on the background. As after I got emancipated, I did keep in contact with my parents and siblings, even though our bond never have become as a true family could have been. But that is not their fault, it is the fault of the broken care system. As much good as the care system could have offered, it never did.
One of the greatest problems of the care system is what the problem is of society, people care first of all about themselves. Money that should go to the care of people in care goes to those who it shouldn’t go to. We know the stories of what happened among organizations like UNICEF far too well. It’s why many people don’t wish to donate to them and prefer smaller charities. But when it comes to the care system, many don’t wish to open up. There are so few voices, which is why I am so glad to see people like Natasha Phillips speaking up so often, who’s a recommended follow on Twitter. (I don’t do follow Fridays and things like that, but she’s truly amazing.) It’s not like there’s 1 country in specific the care system is a problem, it is an international problem.
The PSA I talked about earlier in this blog post, was exactly about one of such problems of the care system. In former Soviet countries, such as Russia, Ukraine, and Belarus, people with disabilities were not only seen as less but as completely redundant. Everyone knew that people thought like that, but not many people were willing to be open about it. The subject was shrouded by stigma. And in some ways, it still actually is. When looking at the adoption statistics of Russia by what I got shared through friends working for Russian charities, most of the adoptions of children with disabilities don’t happen domestically, but almost always internationally. One of the countries that long has been known for having a lot of parents wishing to adopt these children was the United States. The law banning adoption by American parents has caused a lot of problems. As currently, most children with disabilities don’t have much chance to get adopted, as confirmed by Russian statistics shared by several Russian charities. And with the current political situation… I really shouldn’t need to explain it…
To me, it would have been great to share these things more openly here on this blog. But the reality is that I never would have been able to do so. I don’t have the mental capabilities to do so. Not due to the fact of having disabilities myself. But much rather that I get depressed even thinking about all of these things. It’s why I have become less focused on supplying sources, regardless of the time we live in, but rather just keep writing like I am doing right now. It’s what once was the goal of a blog, writing things and people reading it. Not being required to give fact-check information on every single detail you say. If people would have the chance, they would probably even note the grammatical problems in this blog’s name. That being said, they say little about the fact that the name Twitter refers to twitting, which means teasing or taunting someone. Or worse, twit, which I will let you look up in the dictionary yourself…
At the end of the day, I don’t have the energy to write anymore. I always hear statements like “The USA, the land of the free and home of the brave”. But at the same time, this is also the country that probably takes away as much freedom as countries like China. Platforms like Twitter and Facebook, but also the previously named WordAds, are all fully American, and they limit our free speech constantly. Even while it is not always directly, as more often than not it is through giving so much freedom to the trolls and bullies that you will get forced into silence. Not because you are weak or anything like that, but because there are too many people these days that lack all sense of decency, humility, and compassion. Today’s society is so harsh that the average child isn’t even able to grow up happy anymore. Depression and its effects are on the rise at a rapid speed. Which apparently is what people want…
At least Google/YouTube is honest enough to say to the world that all they care about is money and nothing more through their extreme amount of ads and other ways to get as much money from people as possible. The true American value of capitalism(!)
This is why I’m pulling the plug, I am abandoning this blog. Possibly I could explain it better, but it no longer matters. All of it that is left belongs now to my children. What they wish to do with it, is all up to them. Maybe I might guest post or share a translation here in the future if they want to keep it alive, but it is time for me to focus on what is important to me. The things that are missing on the internet too often: happiness, joy, and the love I have for my family, and that they do have for me. And something which I don’t believe I have shared anywhere besides Facebook yet, my soon-to-be-born twin girls, as my wife has been pregnant for some time. Upcoming March is the due date. And all of my family deserve to have me in my best state. Something that I won’t achieve if I try to keep this blog alive any longer.
So, bon voyage, have a happy life. And if you wish to keep in contact, feel free to send a friendship request on Facebook or a follow and private message on Twitter (where I will follow back). Keep a smile on your face and let only kind words come from your mouth. The greatest achievement in life is making someone’s life better, let that be what you do.